THE SHIDDUCH CRISIS ?
The Problem:
On a basic level, The Shidduch Crisis is a growing issue in Jewish communities resulting in not enough singles getting married and those who are dating, encountering increased difficulty and hardship finding their match and dealing with the shidduch process.
The Cause:
There are many contributing factors that result in the Shidduch Crisis. What all of the causes theorized have in common is peoples mindset, not any external forces. The change in mindset that needs to take place is argued upon. Many changes have to be made and the best approach will differ based on the community.
SPECIFIC ISSUES
IGNORANCE ABOUT MARRIAGE
Living in a primarily secular world, we are inevitably influenced by the western “hollywood” idea of love and marriage. There is a huge lack of education on the subject of marriage in the Jewish world. This leads to singles having improper expectations, and increased difficulty getting people married and staying married.
RELIANCE & INFORMATION
Jewish communities are growing and spreading all over the world. Technology to connect people has advanced, however little has been adapted into the shidduch system. We face a problem with information management and are putting too much reliance on shadchanim to marry everyone off.
THE AGE GAP
An issue reportedly affecting North American yeshivish communities, where there are an increasing number of older single girls and not enough older single boys for them to marry. This issue is attributed to the dating pattern of boys starting to date at age 23 and girls starting to date at age 19, creating an age gap.
METHODS TO SOLVING THE CRISIS
EDUCATE
Educate singles, on what marriage is really about, what to look for and how to work on themselves. Educate parents and matchmakers on appropriate priorities and conduct to handling shidduchim.
INNOVATE
Incorporate new ideas and events to help more singles meet their soulmate. Integrate technology to connect the right people and make the shidduch process more efficient.
PERSUADE
Persuade singles to date based on certain parameters and expectations. Many singles can be influenced by those in a position of power. Rabbis, mentors, parents and matchmakers can be encouraged to promote specific dating patterns.
